I fill file an emergency change in custody order tomorow....I have joint custody of my 3 daugters 8( twins ) and a 12 year old....
However every time they come back from their dad they are really traumatized and angry...he is not there most of the time ( working late I guess ) and his new girlfriend who lives with him is traumatizing the kids...she had a car accident last week with the kkids in the car and she was blaming them for it...also my oldest admit it in school yesturday thet she is more at the neighbors house while at her dads bc she hates his girlfriend and he is never around....her grades are also gratly afected...and she told the teacher how unhappy she is at her dads house
There are many other factors and issues....The kids are crying and asking for help from me ...saying that they are miserable there...
Do you think this is enough evidence to change custody...as I said there is a lot more to it...too long to explain
Thank youIs there a chance I will get an emergency change of custody order?Oh honey. This sounds so so very familiar. The short answer is that there is no easy solution to this problem. Once the court gives a dad like that custody, you're pretty much not going to be able to get it away from him.
My children are 9 and 11, and we've been wrestling with a very similar problem for almost 4 years. The one suggestion that may work, depending on the county where you filed for divorce, is to file for a move away. You'll have to pay for the evaluation, which will cost several thousand dollars, but the court will be forced to choose a parent in the event that you move away.
Some counties almost always side with the mom. Others almost always side with the person who isn't moving. It didn't work out for us, but it may for you.
Here are some tips for surviving purgatory:
1) Build really close relationships with your kids. Make lots and lots of time for them. More than you think you can possibly stand right now. Talk to them about everything. Have family dinners. Make sure you spend one-on-one time with each and make sure they know you think that each of them is special. Remember that when they're being the most challenging is when they need the most love. He's going to try some stuff to make you seem like the bad guy, but if you have a strong foundation with them, it won't work well.
2) Be honest about their father, but don't go out of your way to slam him, even when he's being a complete jerk. Answer their questions honestly and completely, but don't complain about him or insult him.
3) Document. Make sure that you write down and keep track of the jerky stuff he does. Keeping a journal is a good way to do it. Unless he leaves a mark on them, chances are, you'll never get to use it, but it may make you feel better to get it out. Who knows? Maybe some day you can ruin his life like he's ruined yours.
4) Keep your cool. Don't panic. Things suck now, but you're going to get through it. Try not to let your kids see you upset, and do your best not to let your ex, the judge, or the mediator see you cry.
5) Hold on to community. Divorces can be really rough on your other relationships. Keep hold of those friendships. Spend time with people at church, family, or the other people you're close to. Make friends with other parents at the kids' school. They may be a witness to your jerk ex's behavior, and they can be a good support and a good resource.
6) Keep your chin up. You'll get through this. Your girls will get through this. Just be there for them and you'll all make it.Is there a chance I will get an emergency change of custody order?How did YOU lose custody in the first place?Is there a chance I will get an emergency change of custody order?Probably not. You have to prove your ex is unfit and nothing you have said makes him sound unfit. Annoying, irresponsible - sure, but not unfit. I would agree on the mental side of things but you will have to prove he is mentally harming the children and for that you will need a counselor or psychologist to side with you - doubt you've gone that route yet...
I recommend you start with counseling for the kids before you go filing emergency custody orders.Is there a chance I will get an emergency change of custody order?You have to have hard proof.
anything else is heresay.Is there a chance I will get an emergency change of custody order?Unless you can deem the other parent unfit, there is a snowballs chance in hell you will get a change in custody. You can document, you can request a meeting with the father, you can support your children the best you can but taking them away will be near impossible. Make the best of it and know 50% of the time they are well cared for. Sorry.Is there a chance I will get an emergency change of custody order?Here is what I would tell you. Forget trying to order an emergency change of custody for now. I would report both he and his girlfriend to child services for neglect. Set up a time with them to interview the kids while they are with you. The kids are old enough to explain to a caseworker what is going on. They'll do an investigation and if they believe the children are at risk, they may file a change of custody with the court for you.Is there a chance I will get an emergency change of custody order?I doubt it. Unless you can prove that she is harming the children..
