I have requested mediation to help settle our current differences. At the time of our separation, I wasn't financially capable to take care of our child alone, and neither was she, but she received full custody.
Things have changed greatly in the last 3 years. I am now making over double her wages 15.05/per hour, and have kept that job steady for since our separation. I have acquired my own home, near our child's school. I have also remarried, and am in a stable relationship for 2 years and running.
The Law states that I had to wait 2 years to make any changes in custody, which is why I'm just now getting around to making the effort.
My ex-wife has been sited for neglect multiple times. At the age of 3 and a half, our child has begun telling me that he wants to live with me instead. He refuses to call his birth mother mom,(calling her, her real name, or referring to her as his sisters mommy) but calls my wife mom, and tells her he wants my wife to make the other mommy go away. We try to reinforce that the birth mom is there to love hime, but he replies with a list of things that he dislikes about his current living situation.
Can anyone explain what goes on during mediation? Should I bring all of my incriminating evidence? I have pictures of neglect, pictures of massive drink till you drop parties in his mothers home, police reports, dcfs reports, etc? or should I take a calmer approach?
My attorney's out today with it being Sunday, and I'm so stomach sick right now worried about what's going to happen and how he is doing right now.
I was told that eventhough this is all going on, the chances are slim of getting full custody. I want my ex-wife to be a large part of our sons life, but she doesn't want to step up and take responsibility.Mediation: Child custody question?At the mediation there are several ways it can go. I would take the evidence you have but not show it unless you feel you need too. Just keep it in a briefcase or something for just in case you need it. A child that young has no say in where they live. All they are going to try to do is see if an agreement can be made, it is not like a court session. Also, you say your remarried and that is great but, do not bring your new wife, they will look at this as a third party trying to get involved. It should be you, your ex, the mediator and attorneys. That is proper.Mediation: Child custody question?your welcome and good luck tomorrow
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Mediation: Child custody question?First off I do not believe that a three year old has much of a conversation regarding this issue. The courts do not take into account 3 year olds words. Three year olds are not known to have alot of desire to make any phone calls either. There is no reason to fret over this, if the child was in danger, all these times the police were going over to the home he would of been removed from the home. You will go into court and say what you would like to see change in your custody situation, and she will say what she feels. These mediators can tell when someone is trying to yank their chain, so tell your desire, you would like to have your child full time, and see what they suggest. These days courts have no problem what so ever giving the father full custory, or shared custody with the child living with the father. I know a few of men and have for years. The reason was obvious to anyone why the father was chosen, just like it is usually obvious if a woman is given custody. Yes traditionally woman were automatically given custody, and I am sure in some areas of the nation this is still true. It is also very common for the remarried parent, get alot of pushing from the new wife to get the child. The new wife wants to feel control. Many new wives are really not wanting to deal with the ex, and that is normal too sometimes. You might win, since you live near the school perfectly shared custody, a week at your place a week at hers. I know someone who does this, and at first it was an odd situation, but they both seem really happy with this situation, and the child doesnt seem to mind going back and forth.