Last night I made the decision to change the custody arrangement with my ex. We divorced two years ago after I found out he was having an affair. We tried the 50/50 custody arrangement in the beginning but our then 8 year old son did not handle it well. We changed our agreement so that he would live with me and spend every other weekend and one night a week with his father.
He is almost 11 now. And he has been asking questions about girls - very innocent questions - and other things that his father could probably answer much better than I can. I realized that he needs more time with his Dad. I have never been an 11 year old boy so I do not know what he is going through. My ex jumped at the chance for more time. So how do I talk to my son about this? I hope I am doing the right thing?well, little boy want to know about girl as much as the little girl want to know about little boy.
Now you are a mom so i believe you would know what intention of the boy to the girl. you also know best what little girl intention to the boy. So you are the perfect candidate to me.
It is also not wrong to let the boy see his Father more often.
Don't forget, by the time he is 15year old, none of you have the custody over him.I hope I am doing the right thing?Ask your son what he wants, not what you think
he needs.I hope I am doing the right thing?Im a mother of 5 boys and it is not easy when they hit you with those questions, lucky you have his Dad because I didn't and so I had to play that roll, but I was honest with them and I know they appreciate me for that honesty. In your situation, I would tell my son the truth, that you feel his Dad can answer his questions better because they are both guys. Good luck to you!I hope I am doing the right thing?First of all I have been an 11 yr old boy in his position exactly. My parents were divorced and they arranged the same thing that you and your ex did (every other weekend and one night a week).
Unfortunately, my biological father was not the one that I went to when I was going through my teenage years, it was my Step Father (who later was allowed to legally adopt me so that I could take his last name and be a legal part of our %26quot;new%26quot; family).
Anyway, I know what he is going through and I can almost promise you (based on what you wrote above) that your son would very much like to see his father.
I would advise you to ask him just to be sure that is his desire, but leave it open for him to decide the when and how, within certain boundaries of course. It sounds like his father is anxious for more time with your son and that in itself in this day and age is not something to be taken lightly or for granted.I hope I am doing the right thing?I'd go to the bookstore and check out books on talking to your son about sex as a single mother. My son started asking questions, but he can't stay at his father's house during the week because of school... so when these %26quot;questions%26quot; come up we have a family night. We go to dinner and play miniature golf and that gives then time to talk. I'll make an excuse to leave for half an hour or something so they have their guy time.
